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"And so you see, Cobalt, once the Alliance of Altruism realizes you're missing, I’m confident that your old comrade Captain Magnanimous will be racing to your aid, to his ultimate peril.”

I looked around the strange chamber, still feeling somewhat groggy from the sedatives. The entire facility seemed to have some complex electromagnetic field apparatus deployed throughout, no doubt to counter Magnanimous’s suite of capabilities and powers. Even simply being restrained, I felt the hair on my head and arms stand up in the statically-charged room. Still, I shook his head.

“Look man.. Doctor… what was it, Molarity? Could I offer a bit of advice?”

“Polarity, you simpleton. Doctor Polarity. Seeing as soon your friend arrives and is defeated, I will have both of you disposed of, I suppose there’s no harm in letting the dead man speak.”

I grinned at him.

“It’s not the good Captain you need to worry about with this whole stunt. It’s my wife.”

For the first time since I awoke in the chamber, this Doctor figure seemed a bit perturbed. Clearly, my lady love was not a factor he had considered in his epic plan to confront my friend.

“Your… your wife? Why is that, who is she?”

I pressed him. “Tell you what, let me out of these restraints, and let me go, and we can forget all about this. I go home, you find some other way to fight Magnanimous, and I save you the beating of a lifetime, ok? Trust me on this one, bud, I’m just looking out for you.”

Polarity seemed unsure for just a moment, but then started to laugh.

“A fool’s ploy, made out of desperation by a doomed man! You cannot possibly expect me to —”

There was a crash above us, and a shower of roofing and rubble that kicked up a heavy cloud of dust. As I blinked and peered through the grime, I saw her. Miranda, the Miragemancer, decked out again in her full supervillian getup. Or, more accurately, I saw her and fourteen of her Illusion-Clones, surrounding the restraint table and our friend the Doctor, who was now positively pale. Tied up as I was, I still felt my heart soar at the sight of her, especially since it’d been a long while since I’d seen her fully kitted for battle. She looked absolutely stunning, the way she did when we used to clash, so long ago. Perks of being in a supermarriage, I guess.

“Polarity.” Miranda’s voice was flat, each syllable hanging heavy with danger.

The mad scientist gulped, and bowed low.

“Miragemancer, to what do I owe this most unexpected pleasure?” He chanced a look upon my wife’s face. “Perhaps the Viceroy of Villainy informed you of my daring plan to defeat the wretched Captain Magnanimous, and you are here to observe or aid in the coming fight? Or have I offended you by capturing your archrival to use as my bait? I would be more than happy to offer you the killing blow on the Cobalt Carabiner, your long-hated nemesis, if it would please you!”

Miranda said nothing for a long while, and I couldn’t help but smile. Having been subject to her withering gaze many a time over the years, it was nice to see someone else squirming under it for a change. Eventually, she continued.

“Why. Do you have. My husband.”

Poor Polarity looked like he was about to keel over and pass out.

“He— HIM? Your husband is… I… uhhh,” he petered out, wilting in place.

Behind me, I felt one of the Illusion-Clones undoing the restraints. I slipped off the table, and flexed my wrists once, twice. Satisfied, I walked to stand alongside my wife. Miranda kissed me on the cheek, a quick and fierce little thing, before turning back to Polarity.

“Carabiner’s alter-ego turned out to be my very own darling husband, which is why you haven’t seen me at any meetings at the Viceroy’s Palace lately. We’ve been enjoying our time away from the Super-Struggle, and I really don’t take kindly to this, Pole.”

Doctor Polarity began bowing and scraping, blubbering out apologies, and right on cue, Captain Magnanimous arrived, levitating down to the floor where we were all gathered through the hole Miranda blew through the roof.

“Miranda, Cole, all sorted then?”

Miranda offered a fist for the Captain to bump. “Yep, appreciate the tip-off, Marty. Owe ya one.”

Magnanimous laughed. “Are you kidding? I’ve never seen ol Doc Pole this humiliated before in all our years, I should be thanking you. Y’all can head home, I think I got it from here.”

I frowned slightly at that, feeling somewhat pouty. It’d been years since I had done any hero work as the Cobalt Carabiner, and in all the excitement, I realized how much I’d missed it.

“Aww come on, Marty, you don’t wanna do one final team-up, to take down Polarity here? I’ve been out of practice a bit but I can still slug with the best of ‘em.”

Marty laughed again, rich and deep, from the stomach.

“Appreciate it, my guy, but judging by the look Mirage’s wearing, she’d have you home sooner rather than later.”

I sighed, and looked to follow my wife out of the facility, only to wobble unsteadily on my legs. The sedatives, it would seem, hadn’t quite run their course. Miranda, alarmed, dove to support me.

“You alright, honey?”

I nodded. “Just a bit shak—woah!”

The next thing I knew, Miranda was princess-carrying me out of Polarity’s lab. I ducked my face low in her embrace so the others couldn’t see my wildfire blush, and allowed myself to be carried off into the cold night.

“So, home then?” I asked.

“Definitely,” she answered, her voice carrying just a touch of spice. “We’re going straight back. Seeing you tied up on the table like that… gave me some ideas.”

END

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Submitted by ShipsoftheLine on Tue, Feb 14, 2023 to /r/WritingPrompts/

The prompt

You were kidnapped by a villain and he gloats about how you're bait for his arch-nemesis, and you'll be dead soon. You sigh and just look at him. "Buddy, its not that hero you need to worry about....its my wife." and he looks at you perplexed.